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Barbisms: The 15 Best Barbara Evans Quotes (EVER!)

Of course "High, high. Yaw both high!" made our list.

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Best Barbara Evens Quotes From Teen Mom

Let’s honor our beloved Barb Evans by looking at some of her best quotes since she’s entered our heart and changed out lives.  Someone please roll the “In Memoriam” music, NOW!

1.

Barbara Evans Quote:  This Guy is Dragging You Down Jenelle!

"This guy is draggin' you down, Jenelle!"

2.

“Yaw nuthin’ but a damn lyin’ hust-a-laaaah!”

“Yaw nuthin’ but a damn lyin’ hust-a-laaaah!”

3.

 “And listen to this.  High, high.  Yaw both high!”

“And listen to this. High, high. Yaw both high!”

4.

“You have the baaaaalls to steal two of my credit caaaaahds!”

“You have the baaaaalls to steal two of my credit caaaaahds!”

5.

“Hope you have fun livin’ in the street wif yaw booooooyfriend!”

“Hope you have fun livin’ in the street wif yaw booooooyfriend!”

6.

“Don’t liiiiie about smokin’ the weeeeeed to the judge!  He’ll throw da book at ya!”

“Don’t liiiiie about smokin’ the weeeeeed to the judge! He’ll throw da book at ya!”

7.

“Well Jenelle, I’ve seen you wif Keifffaaah.  Get out.  Yaw done.”

“Well Jenelle, I’ve seen you wif Keifffaaah. Get out. Yaw done.”

8.

“I thought you broke up with this son-of-a-bitch!”

“I thought you broke up with this son-of-a-bitch!”

9.

“But you know what?  Jenelle is like my clone.  I was a paaaahty girl just like her!”

“But you know what? Jenelle is like my clone. I was a paaaahty girl just like her!”

10.

“Well I always thought you had the bipolar.”

“Well I always thought you had the bipolar.”

11.

 “You and Keiffah are havin’ a la-de-da time – I’m bustin’ my balls tryin’ to God-damn survive!”

“You and Keiffah are havin’ a la-de-da time – I’m bustin’ my balls tryin’ to God-damn survive!”

12.

 “Don’t you laugh at me in my house, you Mr. Disrespectful!”

“Don’t you laugh at me in my house, you Mr. Disrespectful!”

13.

“Yaw smokin’ weeeeeed in front on my house!”

“Yaw smokin’ weeeeeed in front on my house!”

14.

“Yaw too selfish to take care of yaw own kid, ya lil bitch!”

“Yaw too selfish to take care of yaw own kid, ya lil bitch!”

15.

“Shut yaw God damn mouf, Jenelle!”

“Shut yaw God damn mouf, Jenelle!”

We can’t thank  Barb enough for providing us so many laughs throughout these years.  She’s the best and we all can agree we need her back on TV and back into our lives.

Did We Miss a Quote?

We’re sure there are hundreds if not millions of Barb quotes we missed?  Leave a comment below with some of your faves.

31 Responses

  1. Dude. You forgot the one about her “little bitch of a daaawtah (that’s you)”. Otherwise, perfection.

  2. I tweeted, but I’m afraid that Jenelle is not allowed to be on twitter and facebook anymore because of her last visit to the slammer. Apparently some dude filed charges of cyberstalking against her.. But you never know with this little bitch of a daaawtaah!
    Anyway, this is brilliant! Bravo, Patrick, bravo.

  3. I feel like complete shit on a stick, but this made me smile and forget that I want to die. Thanks, P.

  4. What a nice little surprise- I was just sadly contemplating the void left by the end of the TM season, only to have this little gem pop up on my Twitter feed. Miracle! I trust that you’ve heard our little Jailnelle had another photo shoot with the sheriff’s department this week, this time for cyberstalking. When is she going to move past this petty misdemeanor crap and get to the good stuff? According to my calculations- soon. Yes, it looks as if LaQueffah was released from jail this weekend! I sadly live near these trash bags, so I keep tabs on these things to determine how safe the streets are. Dept of Corrections web site has him as being released back into the wild on March 4th. Yes, I predict the grassy knoll will be a rockin’ again in no time.

    It’s really looking like we need a Lock-Up Extended Stay: Teen Mom Edition spin-off (hosted by you, of course, Patrick). I’m still impressed at the news that original recipe 16 & Preg chick, Whitney, was recently arrested for taking a pregnancy test in the bathroom at Wal-Mart. Of ocurse she didn’t actually PAY for the test because she didn’t want to freak out the potential baby daddy. I mean, how much more awesome can it get than teen mom stealing pregnancy test and taking it in Wal-Mart bathroom?! Only if it had been at Barb’s Wal-Mart & she’d caught her could that scenario have had more win.

  5. Patrick thanks for the stroll down memory lame. Erm, ‘lane’. Seriously made my day!

    @Kortney ~ I wish Barb would adopt me, too! To hear that gawgeous aaacent day in, day out, on the regulah. o.m.g.! Of course in realty I imagine the shelf life on that novelty is probably more like 72 hours or less, before I am running out of the house, shrieking, “Leeeave meeee alooooone!”… ah, good times!…

  6. Try to pick a fave..it’s almost impossible one is better than the next! I do though..hold the “I always thought you had the bi-polar” close to my heart along with the “have fun with your booooyyfriend…”
    LOVE IT

    1. Mine is ” You got the nerve to steal two of my credit cards while I’m busting my balls just trying to survive”. Oh and Jace saying the F word in the previews is GOLD.

  7. How long before we see a headline of Janelle and Keiffah gettin arrested for something now that he’s outta the slammer? Thanks for that info Kate! Let’s hope she’s on some form of birth control….imagine the show if she and Keiffah had a kid? Also, why the hell doesn’t Barb go after the father of Jace for child support? After all, she’s bustin her balls heah ….

    Love Barb…love Patrick…can’t wait for Teen Mom 3!

  8. Each one of those photos is suitable for t-shirts, including the captions, of course. And yes, I would need to own several of each. I’m just saying.

    Meta moment at Walmart yesterday: bought roast beef and swiss cheese at the deli department. Talked with the guy who waited on me about Barb. It was as awesome as it sounds.

  9. You don’t know how tempted I am to take a trip down to Oak Island and spy on Barb. I live in VA. It’s only about a 6-7 hour trip. I would love to “accidentally” run into her and get a nice little photo with her.

    I will miss her between now and the next season of TM2.

  10. My hubby and I popped into our local Wally the other day, and I couldn’t help wistfully staring at the deli coun-tahhh hoping maybe, just maybe…..sigh.

  11. YES!! I was coming here just to cry, and I found these gems!!

    I agree with Penelope–T SHIRTS!!!!!!!

  12. Oh gawd, that was ahhhmaaazing! I’m so faaahlaaatterreeed! My “lil b*tch of a dawtaaaugh” didn’t make the cut though? That’s a huuuuge ovahsight, Pahtrick.

    @donna Daahna, I don’t know watchah playin’ at heaah but I’m from Rhooode Island. Yaw high or somethin?”

    Come Skype MeMe ahht 7 p.m.! I’ll warsh up ahftah slicin the deli meat at the Walmaaaaht. *growls*

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