Well here’s something we never thought we’d be reviewing but, alas, here we are. Portable bidets. (Insert Oprah voice here) Your bum is never going to feel betttttter!
Another week, another trend. If someone suggested to us that bidets would become the unsung hero of the year, well, that’s a bet we would have lost. And while these may not be for everyone, let’s be honest, these really are for everybody.
We’re not so far removed from last year that we forgot about the miserable pandemic and the shutdown that the world experienced. When things shut down, well, we all bought all the toilet paper that was available in a 3,000 mile radius. In fact, according to recent stats, toilet paper was the most sought after item during Covid-19 and was almost impossible to find.
So, where do people turn to for help? Well, portable bidets and attachments, of course! Even those were hard to come by and, in fact, one company (WonderSpray) had a kickstarter for their “Butt Shower” with a goal of just $25K. They ended up raising more than $330K. Insanity! Clearly, people are hooked.
If you’re not in the market for a full-on bidet (we’re talking, like, the entire toilet contraption that was in all your Italian friends homes growing up), then portable/travel and attachment options are probably your best bet. The travel ones are more for campers, hikers, and general outdoorsy folks. While the bidet attachment is mainly for those of us who want to just hook it onto our existing toilet and not require the assistance of a plumber (or anyone, really, because we’re embarrassed).
One of the most viral companies in this space is Tushy. They’re pretty amazing and make all of this not embarrassing. We went with their Classic Tushy Spa/Bidet Attachment that was, not only, affordable, but pretty easy to set-up. With the simple turn of the knob you can easily and quickly, um, wash your bum after you poop. On the real, it’ll take care of your downstairs situation way better than toilet paper or even wipes would. Is the sensation weird at first? Yes. Does it work? Yes. Does it feel good? Sure does. But is it really needed? Here’s our official verdict.
You know what? The bidet attachment we tried totally worked. Like we said, it is a little odd at first, but we felt clean as a whistle and it even put a little pep in our step. Plus, we cut down on, like, 80% of our toilet paper use and, well, people claim that’s good for the planet. We don’t know how that works.
So the final verdict? We say, for sure, to do it! Your bum will really thank you for this. As will your underwear. But we digress.
If you’re looking to give this a go, check out our picks for some of the best portable bidets and attachments (so far) in 2023.
Tushy Spa/Bidet Attachment 3.0
$149 $119 (20% Off!)
For the Best-in-Show
Definitely a fave of ours (as this is the one we bought), this upgrade from the fine (and pretty hilarious) folks at Tushy allows you to now clean your bum with warm water thanks to a simple turn of the knob to adjust the temp. It has a self-cleaning nozzle (thank God), doesn’t require any electrical or plumbing help, and currently has over 7,000 ratings and reviews. Learn more here!
The Luxe Bidet Neo
Amazon Ratings: +28,000
For the Budget Buyer
It’s currently one of the best selling attachments on Amazon and at a really great price. It’s perfect if you’re looking to try this out without spending a lot. Plus, it works really well according to more than 28,000 reviews and ratings! You can easily set this one up yourself in mere minutes, it has a self cleaning nozzle, and is designed to fit just about any toilet out there. Learn more here!
Poo Pourri Bidet
For the Quickest Setup
You love their bathroom spray (and commercials) and now you’ll love their portable bidet! It can be set up in 15 minutes or less, it’s sleek and slim in its design so it’ll keep your toilet seat level, and it’ll help you save up to 50% of your toilet paper use. Learn more here!
HappyPo Easy Bidet
Amazon Ratings: +2,000
For the Camper
With this travel option, you don’t even need a toilet at all. Simply fill it with water and squeeze and it’ll clean your bum-bum business without the use of batteries or connections! While it works for the outdoorsy types, it’s also used for women with postpartum, those with hemorrhoids, sensitive skins, and more. Learn more here!
The Mobile Toilet Shower
Amazon Ratings: +450
For the Traveler
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